Confessions

Day 115: Psalm 50-55

Psalm 51 is an amazing psalm about repentance and the deep need for God's mercy and forgiveness. Although the story about David having an affair with Bathsheba and then killing her husband Uriah the Hittite to cover it up is quite familiar, his words here in Psalm 51 are not. In this psalm, David confesses his sin to God and pleads for God's forgiveness.

David's state of mind here--his stance towards God--is one that I have felt during my lifetime. I have sinned. I am a sinner, in constant need of God's grace, just like David is here. David asks God to take away his guilt, make him pure, and give him back his joy. I, too, have been in this same place. In anguish over a sin I have committed. Trying desperately to connect with God. Begging for forgiveness. Repenting in my heart and having every intention to change and then doing it again and again and again.

Only after I committed sins that I said I'd never do--you know, those sins that we judge others for and think are worse than others--well, only after committing sins like that did I really know what it was like to feel the wonderful, miraculous grace of Jesus Christ. To be filled with a new spirit and a renewed sense of faith, hope, and calling. God is good, and through our sins, he brings us to a place where we can see his grace--his wonderful, beautiful nature of salvation--at work.

David utters the following words in this chapter, and I leave you with them here:

"Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a Royal spirit within me." 

May God change our hearts and renew our spirits, just like he did with David.

David's Words to the Lord

Day 110: Psalm 26-30

Once again I'm struck by how well David knows the Lord. He has an understanding of him that comes through in the words he says--the praise and lament he offers to God. I've always wondered why David was a man after God's heart, especially when he was so violent, literally killing thousands of people, and when he killed Uriah the Hittite so that he could take Bathsheba as his wife (after he had an affair with her and got her pregnant). But here in Psalms, I can understand more about the relationship between God and David. It's really special, and I appreciate David by reading his words. At one point in my life, I kept a diary of prayers to God. Maybe I'll start that up again. Writing sure does make things clearer.

Knowing God

Day 107: Psalm 16-18

Psalm 18 is about when God delivered David from all his enemies, including Saul. Two things strike me about this chapter.

1. David tells God "thank you." Saying thank you seems simple enough, but so often we are quick to judge and accuse God when things don't work out, and we neglect to tell God thanks when he is at work in our lives. But saying thank you requires noticing and then acknowledging that God had a role. That seems simple enough, but if we don't notice God's hands at work in our lives, then how can we do it?

2. David knows God. This psalm is very, very lengthy and is filled with praises to God, praises that are, once again, specific and exact. David's words show that he knows God--that he knows what he can do and who he is. I compare David's song here praising God, which could also be considered a prayer (songs are prayers, right?), to some of the prayers we say in church, and I notice a distinct difference: David is confident in his understanding of God in ways that we are not. His confidence allows him to speak to God about God's ways--praising his ways, giving him thanks, and admiring him for all of his ways--and to be confident that he knows God and that he does not speak falsely about God in his praise of God.

Why are we often not so confident in expressing praise about what God has done in our world--both at a local level and a global one? Maybe it's because we don't notice God at work when he's at work. Maybe we don't pray like David does because we don't want to speak ill about God, or to be so arrogant as to assume we know all about God and who he is. Or maybe it's something else. Regardless of the reason, I admire David's confidence, his ability to sing praises to God and speak about God in ways that show he knows God and thanks God for what he has done.

Maybe we can get to know God better by reading these psalms and putting ourselves in the position of the writer.

I Made It to Psalms!

Day 104: Psalm 1-5

Today I started reading the psalms. I've always liked the psalms, although I don't read them too often, but I like how past followers of the Lord put words to their expressions about God. They praise God. They offer lament to God. They ask why, and they ask for help. Many of these psalms are prayers to God, and others are songs to him. The difference between the two is minor. But the psalms are different than most of the rest of the Bible because they are poetry rather than prose, songs rather than narratives. They utilize a different form of expression, a different way of communicating with God. Reading the psalms can enhance our own prayer lives by showing us how others pray and talk to God.

The words that touched me tonight are:

1. "Blessed are those who do not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but who delight in the law of the LORD and meditate on his law day and night" (1:1-2). 

2. "But you, LORD, are a shield around me, my glory, the one who lifts my head high" (3:3). In the midst of fleeing from his son Absalom, David utters these words to God. David feels God's protection and knows that He gives him strength. This psalm was also made into a beautiful song that I really like.

3. "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, LORD, make me dwell in safety" (4:8).

4. "Lead me, LORD, in your righteousness because of my enemies— make your way straight before me" (5:8).

5.  "But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy" (5:11).

A Temple Meeting

Day 79: II Chronicles 1-5

Once again, the story of building the temple is re-told. David didn’t like living in a house of cedar while the Ark of the Covenant was in a tent, so he made plans to build a temple to house the Ark and other items for the Lord. When David (through Nathan) asked God if he could build the temple, God told him that David would not be allowed to build the temple because he had been too violent during his lifetime. At the same time, however, God told David that He would build a house for David instead—a house in which the Lord would dwell forever. So Solomon was the one who built the temple.

When Solomon decides to build the temple, this is what he says, “The temple I am going to build will be great, because our God is greater than all other gods. But who is able to build a temple for him, since the heavens, even the highest heavens, cannot contain him?” (II Chronicles 2:5-6a)

The whole idea about building a temple is interesting. The Israelites wanted to honor God and to give him a holy place, even though they knew that He couldn't be contained in a building. They knew that the earthly building they created would not be near enough for the Lord, yet they wanted a place for their holy items and a place where people could go to feel closer to God. A special place. A holy place. A place that held history inside. A place that cost a lot of money but that was worth it because God was worth it.

Today, we, too, construct temples to the Lord. We have houses of worship where we go to meet God, to be closer to God, to worship God. We have churches where we meet together and commune with others and with Gods. Some of these buildings are elaborate and ornate, while others are simple and bare. Whatever level of the spectrum these churches may fall in terms of decoration, they all are filled with hope that in these places we will meet God. Although we can meet God in many different places, settings, and venues, there's just something special about meeting Him in a church building. God still cannot be contained in a building; He is too big for our roofs, yet we can still meet him there. How wonderful is that.

While we may not always agree about how to build our churches, how they should be used, or even how much money should be spent on them, we can all agree that when we enter there and gather in Jesus' name, we hope to experience the Holy Spirit, the sweet nature of Jesus, and the loving kindness of the Father. May you meet the Lord God as you enter into the doors of your temple.

David's Words of Praise

Day 76: I Chronicles 14-16

David uses such beautiful words to describe the Lord. Tonight, I leave you with these words in which he tells the Israelites to praise God.

⁸ Give praise to the LORD, call on his name;
       make known among the nations what he has done.
    ⁹ Sing to him, sing praise to him;
       tell of all his wonderful acts.
    ¹⁰ Glory in his holy name;
       let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.
    ¹¹ Look to the LORD and his strength;
       seek his face always.
    ¹² Remember the wonders he has done,
       his miracles, and the judgments he pronounced,
    ¹³ you his servants, the descendants of Israel,
       his chosen ones, the children of Jacob.
    ¹⁴ He is the LORD our God;
       his judgments are in all the earth.
    ¹⁵ He remembers ^[c] his covenant forever,
       the promise he made, for a thousand generations,
    ¹⁶ the covenant he made with Abraham,
       the oath he swore to Isaac.
    ¹⁷ He confirmed it to Jacob as a decree,
       to Israel as an everlasting covenant:
    ¹⁸ "To you I will give the land of Canaan
       as the portion you will inherit."
    ¹⁹ When they were but few in number,
       few indeed, and strangers in it,
    ²⁰ they ^[d] wandered from nation to nation,
       from one kingdom to another.
    ²¹ He allowed no one to oppress them;
       for their sake he rebuked kings:
    ²² "Do not touch my anointed ones;
       do my prophets no harm."
    ²³ Sing to the LORD, all the earth;
       proclaim his salvation day after day.
    ²⁴ Declare his glory among the nations,
       his marvelous deeds among all peoples.
    ²⁵ For great is the LORD and most worthy of praise;
       he is to be feared above all gods.
    ²⁶ For all the gods of the nations are idols,
       but the LORD made the heavens.
    ²⁷ Splendor and majesty are before him;
       strength and joy are in his dwelling place.
    ²⁸ Ascribe to the LORD, all you families of nations,
       ascribe to the LORD glory and strength.
    ²⁹ Ascribe to the LORD the glory due his name;
       bring an offering and come before him.
       Worship the LORD in the splendor of his ^[e] holiness.
    ³⁰ Tremble before him, all the earth!
       The world is firmly established; it cannot be moved.
    ³¹ Let the heavens rejoice, let the earth be glad;
       let them say among the nations, "The LORD reigns!"
    ³² Let the sea resound, and all that is in it;
       let the fields be jubilant, and everything in them!
    ³³ Let the trees of the forest sing,
       let them sing for joy before the LORD,
       for he comes to judge the earth.
    ³⁴ Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good;
       his love endures forever.
    ³⁵ Cry out, "Save us, God our Savior;
       gather us and deliver us from the nations,
       that we may give thanks to your holy name,
       and glory in your praise."
    ³⁶ Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel,
       from everlasting to everlasting.
       Then all the people said "Amen" and "Praise the LORD."

God Save the Ark

Day 75: I Chronicles 5-13

This blog post is a continuation of my last post because these chapters contain lists of descendants of the tribes, Saul, David, and others. It also chronicles who played music in front of the temple, who the gatekeepers were, who guarded the temple, and who the mighty warriors were that led David's army.

Chapter 10 once again recounts events that were told in I and II Samuel, as well as the books of Kings, such as the death of Saul and the time David became king.

One story I don't remember reading about, though, is the story of Uzzah, the man who reached out to steady the Ark and whom God struck down because He was angry at him. This passage has always puzzled me because of how cruel it seems. Here was someone who was trying to save the Ark from collapsing on the floor and God strikes him dead right then and there. This man's motives don't seem to matter to God. Why, I wondered?

It seems to me that this story isn't so much about Uzzah's sin as it is about David and his sins. Instead of carrying the Ark like they were supposed to be doing (by holding on to the poles), they were carrying it on an ox. I don't exactly know why. Maybe it was easier for them to guide an animal rather than to carry the thing for miles and miles. I'm not sure. But either way, it was because they were carrying it wrong in the first place that Uzzah had to reach out to steady it from falling. If they had been obeying God from the outset, Uzzah wouldn't have had to lose his life.

Once again, everything boils down to obedience. This time David's disobedience cost another man his life. God wants us to obey him, to obey his laws and to obey his will for our lives. Obedience seems of the utmost importance and over and over again the theme of obedience appears in the Bible.

God wants me to obey.

God wants me to obey.

And when I don't, my actions may impact others. Others may have to suffer the consequences of my sins, just like David's decisions proved fatal for Uzzah. Next time we are faced with a decision to obey or disobey, I pray that we will think of Uzzah and remember that our choices don't just effect us; they may alter the life of someone else.

Wisdom? Really?

Day 66: I Kings 10-13

Solomon accumulated great wealth during his lifetime. No one had more wealth, and no one had more wisdom. However, even with all of Solomon's wisdom, he disobeyed God. He married many foreign women (most likely to gain more wealth) from countries that God specifically forbade the Israelites from marrying (He had over 700 wives and 300 concubines!). Solomon chose to disobey God and turn away from the Lord. He did evil in the eyes of the Lord and did not follow God as his father David had done.

Solomon's choice to turn away from God is puzzling to me. Isn't Solomon the wisest person in the world? Wouldn't a wise person know not to break God's covenant? And at the very least wouldn't a wise person know that he/she should fear God? Maybe there is more than one type of wisdom. Or maybe he was wise as king and not wise when it came to personal matters. I don't know. I can only infer, but it does seem that Solomon has extensive wisdom as a king. He casts fair judgments. He is a knowledgeable and smart businessman. He demonstrates intellectual acumen and intelligence on more than one occasion. BUT he makes very poor personal decisions. He disobeys God and makes treaties (marries) with several different countries. He allows his people to worship many different gods. And he turns away from the Lord. This doesn't seem so wise to me.

So here we have a man to whom God gives wisdom, and Solomon does not use this wisdom when it comes to following God. He uses his wisdom to establish his own reputation, to gain wealth, to gain fame and pride. He doesn't use the wisdom to understand that God is the ultimate king; he doesn't follow God like David does.

What talents and gifts have you been given that you are not using, or that you are using inappropriately? Maybe you are an amazing artist (painter, gardener, cook, musician, writer), and you don't take the time to use these gifts. Or maybe you have the gift of communication. Or personality. Or empathy. Or whatever. Are you using these talents? These gifts? Are you using them to honor God, or are you only using them to bring fame and power to yourself?

God ultimately punishes Solomon's decisions for the sins of their father, and I think that one of these reasons might be because Solomon does not honor God with his gift of wisdom; instead, he becomes selfish and uses this trait to bring glory to himself.

Reflections on King Solomon: Wisdom and Drama

Day 64: 1 Kings 1-4

If God came to you and told you that you could ask Him for anything in the world, what would request?

It would cross my mind to ask for financial security. I'd also consider asking for such things as peace, love, and contentment. I might ask for friends or power or recognition or even more time in the day. Who knows? But I think it's an important question to consider.

Solomon had this option. God told Solomon that he would give him whatever he wanted in all the world. Solomon didn't choose wealth or power; he chose wisdom. He wanted to have a discerning heart, to be someone who could assess situations and make wise decisions. He wanted God to give him greater wisdom as the king of Israel, discernment to make wise and fair rulings and to distinguish between right and wrong.

God granted him this wish, but he also gave him wealth and honor as well. God greatly blessed Solomon.
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The Bible is full of drama! It's like a soap opera at times with murder, sex, and jealousy, and it is so surprising at times! First, there is so much drama involving Solomon becoming King of Israel. Adonijah, David's oldest son crowns himself king, but Bathsheba and Nathan want Solomon to become king so they trick David to give Solomon the crown.

Second, Solomon ends up killing his brother Adonijah because of a request to take Abishag as his wife. I don't really get it. Is Solomon jealous?

Third, Solomon kills everyone associated with Adonijah. Murder, murder, murder. I thought one of God's commandments was "Thou shalt not kill." Why does Solomon get away with all this bloodshed? And the bloodshed of innocent people. I don't understand why God blesses Solomon instead of punishes him.

Additional Note: After I posted this, I was talking to Shane (my husband) about this violent section of I Kings and expressing surprise about Solomon's violence, and he told me that the scene in The Godfather was actually patterned after this section of I Kings. If you've ever seen The Godfather, you know how violent that was. It's amazing (strange) that this would be the case. I am very surprised.
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As David is dying here is the advice he offers his son Solomon:
"I am about to go the way of all the earth," he said. "So be strong, act like a man, and observe what the LORD your God requires: Walk in obedience to him, and keep his decrees and commands, his laws and regulations, as written in the Law of Moses. Do this so that you may prosper in all you do and wherever you go and that the LORD may keep his promise to me: 'If your descendants watch how they live, and if they walk faithfully before me with all their heart and soul, you will never fail to have a successor on the throne of Israel.'"

That's the kind of values I hope to instill in my children.
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Did you know? 
* Solomon married the daughter of Pharaoh, King of Egypt. Wow! Times sure have changed since Moses left Egypt!
* When God appeared to Solomon to ask him what request he wanted, Solomon was dreaming.

Praying David's Songs as an Avenue to a Deeper Prayer Life

Day 63: 2 Samuel 19-24

2 Samuel 22 offers a beautiful prayer of David. At this point, God has delivered David and Israel from the hand of Saul and other enemies and so David sings a song of praise to the Lord.

David opens the prayer in this way: "The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation. He is my stronghold, my refuge and my savior—from violent people you save me." David's prayer continues to praise and honor God for all that God has done.

We can learn many things from David's prayer:
1. David retells all the things that the Lord has done for him. This re-telling of the numerous things God did for David helps David reflect on the goodness of the Lord. When we pray or sing songs to the Lord, we, too, are reflecting on what God has done in our live. We are verbally (and mentally) processing the wonderful things God has done for us.

2. David's successes--and ours too--are because of God's doing, not our own.

3. We can look to God to do what he can do--be our refuge and our strength. What have we to fear with God at the helm of our ship?

4. We can learn a lot about the character of God by the way David describes him.

5. We can pray this prayer/song of David, too. Sometimes it's difficult to know what to pray for or to know how to pray. 2 Samuel 22 offers a beautiful avenue into prayer, and I just prayed it myself. What a beautiful poem. Sometimes our prayers are either dry or cliche, and it helps to be reminded how prayers can be beautifully composed. Just look at many of the Psalms as examples.

May all of us continue to grow in our prayer lives with the Lord. 2 Samuel 22 offers a wonderful example of what to pray.

David: A Man after God's Own Heart

Day 62: 2 Samuel 13-18

Sometimes it's hard for me to imagine the Israelite culture--multiple wives, endless warfare, men killing men and men killing women, even the notion of a kingship. And I also find it difficult to understand the story about Absalom and David. I'm going to ponder this story for now and just going to say that through Absalom's sins and betrayal, David still loved Absalom and grieved his death. In spite of a rebellious son, David loved and forgave his son. There's something to be learned here from David's behavior in this situation. David's actions in these chapters show me why David is a man after God's own heart.

Sin, Consequence, and Prayer: David and Bathsheba's Story

Day 61: 2 Samuel 9-12

David is known for many things: a man after God's own heart (I Samuel 13), a king of Israel, the father of Solomon, the best friend of Jonathan, the husband of Michal and Abigail, a harpist, a foe of Saul, a shepherd boy. But he is also known for one terrible sin: having an affair with Bathsheba, getting her pregnant while she is married to someone else, and then killing her husband Uriah the Hittite so that David could take Bathsheba as his wife.

David's sins here are terrible, and God is very displeased with David. As a punishment for these sins, God decides to kill the child born to David and Bathsheba. After the son is born, David prays fervently to God to change his mind and let the child live. He weeps and prays until the day his son dies--at just seven days old.

There is a lot going on here, and this is a very complicated story. But there are two main aspects I'd like to focus on here: sin/consequence and prayer.

1. Paying the consequences for our sins.
When I was growing up, I often hoped that there were things I wouldn't do. Bad things that I knew were sins. However, as time went on, I began to sin. I didn't just make mistakes; I sinned. And I sinned "big." Sins that I said to myself that I would never do. And these sins changed me. In some ways, I still live with the consequences of some of my sins: whether it's from feeling guilty or suffering from anxiety or being affected mentally or emotionally. However, because I have sinned, I know more about the saving grace and redemption of Jesus Christ. I am forgiven. I am healed. I am pure. All because of the blood of Jesus. 

When I hear of someone committing an awful sin, I'm not too surprised anymore. Sure, some of my attitude is probably because I've become desensitized to it. But I think it's more about realizing that we're all human and not feeling so prideful about myself. We all do things that are completely out of our nature--things that we promised ourselves we would never do. And so I try to approach people and life more by viewing us all as sinful beings--no matter how "bad" the sin is--and not be so judgmental about myself or them when we do sin. Sure, we have to pay the consequences for our sins, but no one is better than someone else just because "Well, hey, at least I didn't do that." We are all sinful, yet we are also saved and forgiven because of the blood of Christ.

2. When the answer is NO.
David prays fervently for God to spare the child, but God says, "No." We often wonder why God tells us "No" when we pray to him. Maybe we haven't sinned as David did when God tells us no, or maybe we have. But it's interesting that we have an example of someone begging God to change his mind, but God's answer remains the same--He will kill the baby. This situation--even though God does not allow the baby to live--changes David. David is a different person through this process of dealing with the consequence of his sin. He's also different due to the prayers he prayed to the Lord--even though God's answer was no. David is probably more understanding, more forgiving. He recognizes that he is not invincible, and he is forever a changed man.

While I firmly believe that prayer can change God's mind, I also believe that prayer changes people. Just like when we have a fulfilling and open conversation with a friend, we leave feeling happy, elated, and content, when we have a conversation with God, we are changed, too. I've often wondered what the purpose of prayer is, and David's example here gives us a glimpse into one such purpose.

God's Covenant Can Heal a Grieving Heart

Day 60: 2 Samuel 5-8

David becomes king over Judah and Israel when he was thirty years old, and he reigned for forty years. Chapter 8 says that he did what was just and right for all his people, and the Lord was with him. God is establishing his covenant with David and promises to bless David and all of Israel.

I don't have too much to say about the reading for today, but I do want to remind us about the covenant God established with us, especially in light of the terrible events that happened at Fort Hood yesterday. Once again we are confronted with a horrific, evil act and question how we can make sense of it. Understanding what happened may never occur for us, but we can realize that God has established his covenant with humans, and no matter what happens in this lifetime, he has prepared a better place for us. For those who are left behind, my prayers are with you and your families. I pray that you will feel loved and comforted by remembering God and the covenant he made with you. May this act of remembering help you work through your grief.

King David as a Changed Man

Day 59: II Samuel 1-4

The house of Saul and the house of David are at war after Saul dies. Judah (where David lives) and Israel (where Saul lived) are fighting over who can have control of the nation. Israel is at war with itself. What must God think of this?

Did You Know?
Did you know that there was another king of Israel at the same time as David? His name was Ish-Bosheth, and he was a son of Saul who was made king by Abner, the commander of Saul's army. Ish-Bosheth was only king for four years, though, because he was murdered at the hands of David's men (without David's

David's character has changed. No longer is he willing to kill anyone that gets in his way (although he does steal his former wife Michal back from her husband). But David is growing. He is distraught over the death of Saul and Jonathan, and when his people kill two of his enemies (Abner and Ish-Bosheth), David kills them for thinking they can take vengeance into their own hands by killing innocent people. God is forming David, and the changes in his behavior and actions are evident.

That's how it is when we allow God to work in our lives. We change. We grow. We rely more on the Lord and less on ourselves. We realize who holds the ultimate power in our lives. Through David, I'm learning more about what it means to be in relationship with God. I hope you are, too.

Changing History: The Story of Abigail and the Witch of Endor

Day 58: I Samuel 25-31

The Bible is full of stories about men. From Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, and Aaron to Samuel, Saul, and David (and these are just the ones I've read so far), stories of men dominate the Bible. This was a patriarchal society, so it's not very surprising that women aren't brought up as much. Because stories of women aren't as prevalent in scripture, when we do read about a woman in the Bible, the story stands out more.

Two women play key roles in the passages for today: Abigail and the medium (or witch) of Endor.

1. Abigail: Abigail is married to Nabal, and they are very wealthy. Nabal makes some mistakes with David, and David is ready to kill him until Abigail pleads to David to forgive her husband and not murder him. David is listens to Abigail and thanks her for reminding him that he shouldn't take revenge into his own hands. David spares Nabal's life, but 10 days later, Nabal is struck dead by the Lord. Abigail really impacts David, and after Nabal dies, she becomes David's wife. 

2. The witch of Endor: After Samuel dies, Saul does not get any response from the Lord, and so he summons a medium to help him get in touch with Samuel.The witch successfully summons Samuel to the room, and they engage in a seance. Samuel prophesies to Saul that Saul and his three sons will die the next day in battle with the Philistines.

These two women are major factors in the unfolding of the biblical story. Abigail's humility in persuading David alters the course of David's life and of her own. David realizes how he must always go to the Lord first, and Abigail becomes the wife of a future king. Likewise. the witch of Endor plays a major role in Saul's life, particularly in his journey towards repentance.

While women may not be mentioned as often as men in the Bible, they, too, serve important roles in the kingdom of God. Even within a patriarchal society in which women were systemically oppressed, the authors of the Bible still give some women a voice, which demonstrates to me that God values the contributions and perspectives of women, too.

David's Actions and King Saul's Reactions

Day 57: I Samuel 21-24

Jesus' idea of turning the other cheek when someone is out to harm you is actually found in the Old Testament. David has a chance to kill King Saul (who has been chasing David all around the countryside trying to kill him), but he doesn't do it. Instead, David cuts off a corner of Saul's robe when Saul isn't looking and presents it to Saul. When Saul realizes that David could have killed him but didn't, Saul weeps. He is deeply saddened about his own actions and begs David not to kill off his family. David swears not to kill them off.

Have you ever done something so bad that after you do it you weep about your actions and/or behavior? I know that I have. Saul here shows a contrite and repentant heart and sometimes it takes someone showing us another way before we realize what we have done. Saul's weeping is significant because it shows us that he does have a conscience and he is sorry for his behavior. But it took a very dramatic event in which he almost died in order to come to this point.

We don't often think of our sins as serious (at least not on a day-to-day basis). Jesus came and died for our sins and he has made us pure again, right? Well, this is true, but when we do spend some time reflecting on the choices we make and the sins in which we are entangled, we are formed in cruciform ways, ways that will affect our perspective, emotions, and actions.

From Saul we can learn the importance of evaluating ourselves and where we are in our life. We can also learn about the importance of making things wrong with people that have wronged us or whom we have wronged.

And from David we can learn about the importance of turning the other cheek when someone wrongs us. He also shows us how to praise God in the midst of pain, worry, and fear.

Motivations Leading to Actions: The Story of David and Goliath

Day 56: I Samuel 17-20

The story of David defeating Goliath has always been a favorite one of mine. Here you have this young kid volunteer to take on Goliath. David is obviously outmatched by this strong man, but he still has the boldness (and audacity!!) to attempt to defeat this Philistine giant. And what's crazy is that he does it. He kills Goliath with a stone and a slingshot. No armor. No sword, shield, or helmet. David wins. End of story.

But have you ever thought about David's motivations for volunteering to fight Goliath? Here are some of the reasons I think David was motivated to fight Goliath.

1. To honor God and bring God recognition. David wanted to demonstrate that even though he appeared weak in the eyes of humans, with God's help, he could defeat those who appeared stronger. The Lord is obviously on David's side, and David wants to show "the whole world" that there is a God in Israel, and that He is on their side.

2. David's ego and pride. This one is totally based on my own inference, but it does appear that David's brothers love to hate him, just as Joseph's brothers loved to hate him as well. So, David wants to show up his brothers. They are jealous of him, and as the youngest, David wants to demonstrate his strength, skills, and abilities, even though he is a "mere shepherd." In addition, the entire Israelite community would know that this one man (David) had killed someone that all the other Israelites were afraid of. David would become a household name.

3. Financial and personal motivations. David asked several times what the reward was for the one who defeated Goliath. The answer was threefold: the man would become very wealthy (the king would give him a lot of money); he would get King Saul's daughter in marriage; and his family would be exempt from taxes. It seems obvious that David is motivated by more than godly reasons; however, I do find it interesting that when Saul offers David his firstborn daughter Merab, David declines. And he only marries Michal, another of Saul's daughters, after Saul offers her to him numerous times (with the aim of trying to trick and kill David).

These are just a few of David's motivations for offering to fight Goliath. I'm sure there are more, but the point I want to make is that motivations are complex. We often can't say that there is only one thing motivating us. While we hope that our motivations are pure and godly, there are usually other motivations at work as well. The challenge is to learn to discern which motivations are from God and for God and which ones are more selfish and worldly. When we can begin to understand why we do things (our motivations), not only will we come to know ourselves better, but we will also see more about the purity and holiness of God.