The Love Dare: Write It Down!

Day 146: Song of Solomon 5-8

Typically when I'm in my care, I listen to Christian radio. It's encouraging, uplifting, and I can have it on when the kids are in the car with me. Ever since I have been commuting to Waco in the morning, I have had on K-LOVE (a radio station broadcasted in numerous markets nationwide). The morning DJs, Lisa and Eric, are currently participating in and advocating a 40-Day "Love Dare." This dare is based on the popular book, The Love Dare, from which the popular movie Fireproof was based. Now I have not seen the movie, nor have I read the book or completed the 40-Day Love Dare. However, what I have gathered by listening to them talk about this dare on their radio station is about the importance of loving, honoring, respecting, and encouraging your spouse.

After finishing Song of Solomon today, a book filled with words of love between people and about one's loved one, I noticed how descriptive these people are of their loved ones. They list numerous positive characteristics about their "beloved," and they focus on all the wonderful characteristics held by their loved one. I don't know how often we write down the things that we love about our spouse, but I do know there was an exercise like this in The Love Dare. I think that writing down the things we love about our spouse can do several important things, and at the top of the list is that this activity can remind us of the positive things. So often the one or two things that bug us about our loved one seem to come up again and again and again, but when we write down the positive attributes, our focus changes. We become more in tuned with our spouse. We are happier. We forgive more. We give our spouse the benefit of the doubt. Our perspective is altered. We see our spouse differently. Perhaps the book and the activity of The Love Dare is so popular because we come to see our spouse in ways that God sees him or her.

I have always been an advocate of writing-to-learn, the theory that says writing is generative. You learn what you think by writing it down. And I think it's important to write down all the wonderful things about our loved ones--spouse, children, boyfriend/girlfriend, sister, brother, mother, father, friend. By reflecting on what we love about them, we come to see them as God sees them, as we should see them, and we love them more. During this month of love, I hope you will consider writing down in secret the things you love about those most precious to you.